unknown void

By Nicole Cannon

i gave myself vertigo 
scrolling yesterday, searching  
for the missing tweet 
the meaningful meme 
to fill the emptiness 
the unknown void 

my offline brain 
flips through the Rolodex  
of inconsequential memories— 

the greasy French fries 
in Zihuatanejo 
that gave us all the shits— 

the heads turning  
at the Beverly Hills hotel  
me feeling both important and
not enough 
at the same time— 

the smell of chlorine 
at the hotel pool 
during Bubbie’s 
Bridge Tournaments— 

my sister and i 
swimming alone 
until our lips turned blue— 

the red velvet lining 
of the metal heart-shaped jewelry box 
snapping shut 
with a muffled clang— 

the board game 
at the cabin 
pieces like mini wrenches
linking red and black pegs

they say when you die  
your life flashes  
before your eyes 

mine’s on slow mo 
taking its sweet time 
collecting all of my selves 
before passing through into another dimension 

the thread of life 
weaves its way through a 
series of breaths and 
gathers up memories 
of identities 

the abandoned 
pitch tents 
setting up camp 
beneath the underpass 
of my neuro freeways 

these are the things i will leave behind— 

clenched teeth 
whispered screams 
shushing me at two 
struggling 
to get off his lap 

the fifty year old surfer 
i met on Bumble 
who muttered to himself, 
“this is gonna last me a while” 
before he ghosted me 

these are the thing i will miss—

the soft tuft of hair 
on the edge of my 
newborn’s ear 
latched onto my breast 
eyes drifting closed 
and open again 
in the fight against sleep 

the chiming leaves 
of the aspen cathedral 
as wind rushes 
through the forest 
and the crunch of 
ice crystals beneath my
feet from the last spring
snow 

this is where I am going— 

dissimulating  
into the cacophony of wild
birds in Belize at dawn 

dissolving  
into the intense stillness 
like the low flat energy 
of Joshua Tree 

merging  
into the electric green  
strobe light flash 
the last kiss of the sun  
eaten by the Sea

Nicole Cannon is a versatile artist who works in various creative fields, including writing, acting and producing. She wrote and produced her third screenplay, a psychological thriller titled, "Transference" available on Amazon. She likes exploring themes of the human psyche, what molds the constructs of our identity, integration through healing, and transcendence. Currently, Nicole is focused on her first poetry book and a short film project planned for filming in the fall. IMDB, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter.